January 11, 2005

Heading Back To The Solitude

You know how sometimes 3 weeks seem to go by in like 3 seconds? Like someone hit the fast forward button on life and while you were taking the time to blink, the world sped by?

Well, that's how I expected this break to go, but looking back, it really feels like I've been here for a long time.

People keep asking me if I'm ready to go back, and I keep shrugging my shoulders and hesitating. I don't know if I'm ready. I was really hoping for some clarity while I was home, but I stayed so busy and occupied that I just haven't had time to think about it. My family here was here from the day I got home and stayed for a solid week for Christmas. Then I went to Kentucky to see my wonderful college friends for New Year's. Then I was graced by the presence of my Wisconsin kindred spirits and we went camping. So, I was really hoping this past weekend would give me enough time to process some of what's going on, but it ended up being more quality family time.

Not that I'm complaining about family time, because they are amazing and I am thankful that I had some only-kid-time with my folks.

But I'm wiped out...emotionally and mentally. I need some alone time. I need a LOT of alone time. I guess it will even out. When I was in Guatemala, I was craving family and friends, and now that I've had boost of that, I'm ready for some alone time again.

There are all these things swirling around in my brain, but I'm tired and I still have so many things I need to get done before my flight tomorrow. I know that soon I will have ample time to process all of this, and when I do, I'll be back.

Until then.


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